the life of a mother with youth
Wednesday, June 30, 2004
I set out to find the official meaning "hump day" and why it is called so. I found that no one really knows who called it this first or why but assume that the person was either a really big perv or hated their life so much that they decided that Wens. was the middle of the week and if they had made it that far, Thurs. and Fri. would be ok too. I don't really know BUT, "hump day" for me is EVERYDAY!
To me, "hump day" is any day that I put the kids in the car. This means that I will have to "hump" to get them ready on time, I will have to double "hump" to make sure my shoes match, "humping" the diaper bag, apnea monitor, Nicholas in his car seat (23lbs all together) and Isaac by 1 arm to the car. Then I make a "hump" sound as I lift each into my Kia Sportage 4x4. Finally I make more "hump" noises as I buckle each child in. FINALLY! It is my professional opinion, as a mom, that "hump day" was created by a mother who experienced a similar experience on a daily basis. Perhaps the reason that it is tagged onto a specific day is because back when people did things for the first time (1800's), there wasn't the convience of auto anything and "going to town day" was on Wens. Makes sense to me.
Now that you see my way of logic, are you scared? if so, for who are you scared? *laugh*
Tuesday, June 29, 2004
the family co-op
I've had one of those busy days where nothing is accomplished. It started atypically. My husband went to work 12 hours earlier. This meant that the kids had to be woke up early. Kids are not happy when they are woke up early to be rushed out the door to take their favorite person to work. Nicholas was like, "um, where's my titty?" and Isaac was generally pissed -- he didn't get his coffee. In the rush of the morning, Daddy forgot half of the things that he needed for the week, including his pillow -- poor baby. Isaac got in a better mood when he got to play in Daddy's "beg fruck." Somehow the kids always make my day completely better, this happened several times today.
The first "better" was after we left Daddy at work. Nicholas was very unhappy at this unscheduled morning trip and was literally screaming. Isaac bent over his car seat and under the canopy of Nicholas' and said, "its otay bankie, daddy at work nda beg fruck n momma gonna go to grammas and her'll give me a cukie." I don't know if it was Isaac talking to Nicholas or the fact that Nicholas was wondering .oO well, don't I get a cookie? Oo. Needless to say, it worked and Nicholas happily chewed on his strap covers on the way to Grandma's.
The next "better" was at Grandma's. Austin and Isaac were fussing over something, I can't remember now, but Isaac was very upset. He wanted me to kiss it and make it better but I had my arms full of Nicholas administering a very needed dose of titty. Breastfeeding relaxes me to the point that I could go to sleep, so to Isaac, I was probably looking like I was ignoring him. Isaac then tells his brother, "bankie, *jibber* *jabber* *more jibber and jabber*." Nicholas then stops sucking, Isaac leans down and Nicholas gnaws Isaac's nose. Isaac was better, Nicholas was confused and I almost wet myself laughing.
The final "better" takes a little more explaining but I'll try my best to keep it short for your reading pleasure. Nicholas loves his bath. He would stay in water if I'd let him but obviously I can't do that. Every night I put him in his baby bathtub in the kitchen sink. We splash, coo and have a great time making faces at each other while I wash him. The whole experience is relaxing with the exception of the removal of Nicholas from the tub and until he is wrapped in his blanket, getting titty and going to sleep. So, I take him out of the tub and he starts crying. I lay him on his belly to rub lotion on his back and bum and he is crying. Flip him over and rub the rest of his body in lotion, he is crying. Dress him, he's crying, brush his hair, he's still crying, clean his ears, yep, you guessed it -- still crying and brush his gums, he get quiet for this. Let me remind you that I do this every night and Isaac is usually already in the bed and asleep throughout the experience. Tonight, for some reason, Isaac gets out of the bed, comes into the kitchen and talks to Nicholas as I'm rubbing him down. Isaac starts patting Nicholas' head, as if he were a puppy, saying, "its otay bankie." This instantly soothes Nicholas. He is quiet. I must say that it is much easier to dress an infant if they are not upset. When I had Nicholas completed and as I looked down at Isaac to tell him thank you but to get back in the bed, Isaac looks at me and says, "der ya go april, bankie all better and I go night night but I need tea." I couldn't help but laugh again. Isaac held his empty sippy cup the entire time he soothed Nicholas. I laid Nicholas in his crib long enough to fix Isaac a fresh sippy cup of milk, usually Nicholas could be heard for 4 counties screaming but not tonight. He gave Isaac and I the same patience that Isaac just showed him. I was able to get Isaac's milk, put Isaac in the bed, tuck him in, give him kisses 3 times and return to my bedroom to get Nicholas and he was quiet the whole time, laying there completely content.
This is just one more example at how great kids, life and the combination of both can be.
Monday, June 28, 2004
blowing my own horn...
I've has the opportunity to witness a young lady recently. This chick is younger than I am in many ways. When I was her age we had a few things in common: new relationship with an older man, "married" life, being confused about everything, not knowing anything and not really making any plans for the future. I really want to help this chick out, by taking her under my wing and teaching her things before she has a life altering occurance happen and HAS to learn them. It all made me think about how I became the person I am and why I decided to take the paths that I did. *plays "Memory"*
#1 - DO NOT have children before you have fed, sheltered and clothed yourself for atleast 5 years completely on your own. Sure, family will help if they have to but trust me, they don't want to.
#2 - DO NOT assume things. Always ask questions. It is better to bug the hell outta whoever is teaching you than to assume and really fuck up.
#3 - DO NOT finance used cars from anyone other than a dealer with a large company name in it. Ex: Ford, Chevy, Buick, Dodge.... You have to have full coverage insurance and the greatest number of used cars NOT on larger company dealer lots are pieces of shit and will cost you more than you want to pay.
#4 - ALWAYS write out contracts. Verbal contracts are useless. This rule even goes for family members. Family is blood and it is thicker than water -- until it comes to money. Business is business and if you don't cover your ass, no one will.
#5 - DO NOT loan anything that you can't replace. This includes money.
#6 - Accept that NO one, even you, is perfect. This will make dealing with people that have to be in your life easier to deal with.
#7 - Be fair at all cost. Situations will vary but always be fair to yourself or others involved. This rule may hurt the worst now but will pay off in the long haul of life.
#8 - ALWAYS respect elders. I know they look funny, smell wicked, forget to put their teeth in and tell the same stories over but they will tell you more rules to help your quest in life.
There are more rules to life but following the advice of these eight will certainly keep your pocket fuller, your mind at ease, your sanity in tact and outbursts of bullshit to a minimum.
~~living and loving it
Sunday, June 27, 2004
Around this time every year, until November, I get very sentimental and thankful. Nicholas receiving his shots and living the night afterwards brought this years period on early.
I thank my lucky stars that I have beautiful children who are smart, well behaved and I have the patience to be a good mother. That I have a husband that loves me for who I was, am and will be, who works hard to support his family that he loves dearly and isn't afraid to show it. That I live in the mountains of North Carolina, where it is quiet, clean and everyone knows everyone. That I have a living mother and father and that my eldest brothers and sisters live no where close *laugh* That I have a washing machine and dryer at home. That my car is paid for and in great running order. That our bills are paid, there is plenty of food in the cabinets and we still have $20 to spare. Thankful for second chances and the people that give them. Lord knows I used that last one to the brim.
There are more...
~~all gooey and stuff
Saturday, June 26, 2004
tornados, swollen parts, a love shack and a bulge...
If you have never changed a child's diaper when his ass exploded and you looked at the child and pondered where to start, then you will not be able to comprehend the current condition of my house. I gave up on chores today and sat down with my kids and played all day. It was fairly decent when my dad came this morning to pick up Austin but progressively got worse throughout the play periods. There are legos in the silverware drawer, crayons in the bathtub, matchbox cars in the formation of a rug in the middle of the living room floor, all of the fitted covers on the couch and chairs are either hanging off of its particular piece or abstractly placed over it. I noticed a few dust bunnies today and ordered them out. If they aren't gone by morning, I will charge them rent. The kitchen sink still has the baby bathtub in it, the counters are covered with a collage of construction paper and old pictures, there is a pot of "afbet soop" (clean pot with foam letters in it) in the kitchen floor. I had to wade through the toys on the floor of Isaac's room to tuck him in and decided to make a path on my way out. Hubby will be home in the morning and when he arrives, the house will be perfectly placed....on the outside *grin* I will enlist Isaac to help me in the morning and the inside will be almost perfect.
Nicholas' little legs and right arm were swollen today. This is a natural reaction to immunization shots. He's been more of a cuddle baby today than ever before. I love the way he can't get close enough. Please don't tell my husband that I enjoy cuddling, if you ask him now he'd say that I do not cuddle. *laughs* I've let him believe this for years due to the fact that cuddling leads to sex and when I want it, I want it, when I don't, I don't. I just realized that I put my infant and sex in the same paragraph, I swear I'm not a perv.
Camping, without a camp...
My cousin and his brand new wife came for a visit. Sex was vetoed in the room that they were to sleep in so the smartass brought a tent to set up in the yard. If you're in Mayberry and hear moaning and groaning, its not the wind. This is yet another example of a man and his problem solving abilities. I can see God now after he made man, I bet his first thought was, "oh damn I messed that one up, let me try that again - this time with a fully functional brain, a nicer shape oh and breasts!" Afterwards he must have been exhausted but decided to stop after creating perfection. Afterall, we were the last thing he made before he rested. Women are more solid than the earth, more beautiful than nature and smarter than men. *laugh*
Tim and I cut Isaac's hair last week when Tim was home. It turned out really cute but we found a tick, that had latched on. It completely freaked me out. I went to get tweezers to pull it out and when I came back, hubby had already taken it out and burned it alive. So I've been watching him closely to make sure he doesn't change physically, mentally or socially. He developed a knot-like-bulge on the back/side of his neck. I ask the doctor about it yesterday and she told me that all was groovy and to make sure to check it and told me what to look for. It hasn't changed so we're all good!
Last night I dreamed that I was the designer of a steering wheel for a car. Imagine that! I went through trial and error but ended up with a steering wheel that I'd love to own myself. Instead of a horn, it had 6 small buttons - 3 on each side of the middle part of the wheel. When pressed this is what the car did...
1 - said, "fuck you"
2 - said, "what the hell are you doing?"
3 - said, "that's it, I'm calling the cops"
4 - said, "pull over and I'll whip your ass"
5 - said, "where did you get your license?"
6 - said, "I hope you have insurance"
Ok, at this point I think it is time to introduce you us. Here goes *grin*
My husband and I...
Austin, my 7 year old brother...
Isaac, my 3 year old little monster...
Nicholas, my 2 month old titty baby...
Murphy, my 1 year old furball of stubborn love...
There will be more pictures soon.
Friday, June 25, 2004
drinking, driving, needles and racing
The kids and I spent our fair share of time in the car today. I live in the country, naturally country music is the only available -- unless you love the goldies *lol* So we are listening to 104.1 WTQR
. We are singing along and then the whiskey songs came! "whiskey woman" "whiskey lullabye" I have to admit that my favorite drink, when I drink (rarely), is whiskey but why play them back to back? It was a random thought that made me stop and think -- it hurt!
Onto the kids...
Isaac ordered "cake sticks and cake juice" for breakfest. For those of you that do not speak toddler, he really wanted french toast sticks and syrup. When I ask, "and to drink?" he answered, "tea". I know you're thinking .oO NO WAY! Oo. Seriously, he wanted coffee. The kid is a bigger coffee freak than I am and is twice as horrible to deal with if he doesn't get it in the morning. Austin had milk with his "sticks n juice". Nicholas had titty with a titty chaser.
Toddler Coffee Recipe
1 leakproof cup
fill leakproof cup half full with coffee, add milk to rim
Next we had a race, a dressing race. Can Austin dress himself faster than I can dress Isaac? The prize was control over the remote. I wish there was a way to put you guys in Isaac's room while we do this, it really is hilarious. Isaac and I always lose, partly because he gets coffee before we get dressed. Austin is convinced that he is faster than Superman. After brushing our "teefers" we were whisked away in the land of Spongebob Squarepants. I will not go off on this subject at this time but it will come soon! While the kids watched Spongedork and Nicholas slept, I cleaned the kitchen, gathered the trash, cleaned the floors and straightened the bathroom -- you know, all of that fancy domestic engineering stuff.
Before I knew it, it was time for lunch. Once again I turned to the boys for advice and recieved, "wurms and tea" as an answer, from Isaac. Loosely translated "wurms" are really "Ramen Noodles
" and "tea" meant "koolaid
". Austin agreed to Isaac's suggestion and so it was, wurms and tea, for lunch. Both of them ate well. Nicholas had titty with titty on the side.
You'd think it was naptime by now -- as if! Austin is, "too old" and Isaac follows Austin's lead. So I command them to what I call, "whisper mode", which is quiet time where they don't go to sleep but lay down for 30 minutes. This gave me enough time to get ready myself. I don't wear make-up, putting animal fat on my face isn't my idea of pretty. My hair is long (way down back but not over the bubble), red, curly and thick so I don't even bother trying to tame it. Basically, I used this time to find something decent to cover the large thing that follows me around, ass I think it is called. I ended up with a nice little rig that was comfortable but going through dresser drawers always reminds me of how large birthing children will cause your ass to be. I won't mention the floppy or solid fat parts, at this point.
Note to self: describe "baby fat" in future blog
A the day races forward...
After lunch, I packed the diaper bag with Nicholas on my hip and tit, Isaac on my heels and Austin begging for chocolate milk. FINALLY we made it to the car, where Isaac just HAD to strap hisself in ~ loss of 5 minutes there ~ which was all good because I had trash to load, kids to cram and where the hell did I put the keys? Driving carefully from point A to point B, then to point C, right before point D and coming to a halt at point E, we made our way through my errands and had arrived safely at the dr's office.
Nicholas got his 2 month check-up today. As if the doctor poking and proding wasn't enough, he also recieved 5 shots. Poor baby got 2 in each leg and 1 in his right arm. I'm worried but I won't go into it at this time -- this post is too long already.
Holy cow! I went to make a comment on Mynna's
site and it kept giving me a fatal exception error. So I would back it up and do it again until it went through. Now there are 4, count'em, 4 of the exact same posts. As if that isn't hilarious enough, I tried to delete 3 of them and I'm getting the same error message. The internet! Go Figure!
FINALLY, it has taken my requests. That server works like our government leader thinks.
The first thing that comes to mind as I sit here is that a Thank You is in order. I have always had an internet obsession. Through a 6 year natural migration, I've went through chatrooms, games, leagues, web design, graphics design and now I find myself blogging. With the exception of web design and graphics design, blogging is the only NOT pointless thing on the internet that I've accomplished and it doesn't require anyone else *cheer*. My prior escapade was what I refer to as the League Lead By Losers. Don't get me wrong, not all leagues are bad, corrupted or mislead by administration and the members of any league are generally people with great personalities but I obviously have issues with the leaders of a particular league. If you find yourself asking, "what is this league stuff?" you are lucky! Take my word of advice and do not seek to find the answer. Not all was lost though, I met some online people that I am actually proud to say that I have an association with. Would I call these people friends? Since I don't use the term loosely, I'd have to say no but this may change if I were to ever actually met one of them. So, thanks Jules, for this new addiction to something other than pointlessness.
Next order of business...
Being that I am in the business of internet design, I see prospective business success in this blogging thing. Now all I have to do is figure it out *lol* There are still several things that I can not comprehend, this is due to my inability to grasp new things quickly. I have a need to know the things I am involved in to nothing short of completion. "Moped" would best describe the sponge that hosts my knowledge, "slow but dependable". Once I invest the time to get to know something new, I boast to understand it as a specialist would.
No, I don't live in them but I have a few going. I plan on adding "days since" counters to my blog page. These counters will keep track of how many days it has been since I indulged in things that I need not. Examples : "days since.." ; chocolate, sugar, fat, Isaac's diaper use -- to name a few. I'm also working on a new design for the page, although I love the first one I didn't create it and that is a pain in my ass. I'm not interested in any kind of anal play so naturally I will create my own design for this page. Eventually, I'll be a Blog Expert and be able to figure out how to do it *lol*
~~feeding my blog addiction
sunny side up
It's amazing at how much more refreshed I am at 5:30 am with a few hours more of sleep. It seems as though if I don't get into bed by 11:00pm, I can not function the next day. Last night I was tightly tucked into bed at a decent time and this morning I feel great. It's a good thing too because the kids and I have a very busy day today.
My house looks like Toys R Us hovered above it, ripped off the roof and puked throughout. There are toys everywhere but the boys have been good so it is a fair trade.
Today is Friday, that means payday! Pay days are usually looked forward to by most people. I've never claimed to be normal though. Payday here means;
~the kids naps will be shorter, causing pissy moods
~dragging the kids in and out of the car to pay bills that I
can't pay online
This fiesta starts when we leave the house shortly after lunch and usually lasts until 6:00pm. However, since we tamed the Food Lion
yesterday, we will be done by 3:00pm. I guess the worst part about pay days are that I have to interact with other adults. I don't like people. The more people involved in your life or required to participate in your life, the more bullshit that you'll have to deal with. I just don't like playing in shit so I don't play ~ if I can help it. Friday's are unavoidable.
In addition to pay day, Nicholas has his 2 month check-up today. I suppose I dread this most. I do not like the sound of the "hurting" cry and I know I will hear it today. Immunization is required to keep him healthy but it doesn't sooth him when I remind him of this fact. I anticipate finding out his weight and height, I am going to guess 18lbs and 26 in long at this point. It will be fun to see how close I am.
I hope that my sunny disposition will last through the attitudes of grown individuals that do not properly channel their aggression and/or stress.
~~time will tell
Thursday, June 24, 2004
is that a bird? a plane? NO, its a...
SUPER MOM! is tuckered out! After staying up way too late, getting up early -- as usual -- and an eventful day, I'm plum pooped!
After the caffeine iv...
While Nicholas slept, I cleaned the kitchen, bathroom, living room and Isaac's room to a sparkling shine. I gave the boys (Austin and Isaac) cereal and stopped to enjoy a cup o joe and another smoke. Nicholas must have a "mom has sat down" alarm because it never fails, 3/4 through a cup and a smoke -- he wakes up starving. I fed him and put him in the swing while I finished the floors.
Then came the Potty Goddess...
Teaching a boy how to potty when you can't stand up and he shouldn't sit down has become quite a challenge. Timing is a definate must as well. So I've got this whole thing figured out! While Austin, 7 year old brother, is here I'll have him go to the bathroom with Isaac (under my supervision of course.) This way, Isaac gets technique down. For fewer "accidents", I've figured out that the commercials come on a regular basis every 15 minutes or so. Austin, Isaac and I promptly go to the potty each and every commercial break on Nick Jr. The only reward I will give is a hug and a kiss -- no candy in this house! Wish me luck.
Taming the Food Lion...
I ask Isaac and Austin, "what would you like for dinner?" They looked at eachother as if they had just been discussing it and Isaac replied, "NACHOS!" with such enthusiasm. I agreed with a little less excitement because we didn't have the ingredients for NACHOS! It was off to the grocery store for us. I forgot the list. Isaac went into a cart and didn't like it very much but Austin offered to push him so that made things better. Nicholas was in the stroller and away we went, to tame the Food Lion. Down each and every isle, I told Austin what to get, Austin gave the things that we needed to Isaac who gave a thorough investigation to each item and dropped it into the basket. We were a finely tuned family unit. That is until we reached the cookie isle. I refused to get Oreos and Isaac began screaming, "but you promised!" Recalling my promises for the day, I couldn't remember that promise. Austin then informed me that I promised them that we would make Mississippi Mud Cups. I immediately instructed Austin to get the double stuffed ones. Isaac was again happy but now Nicholas was awake and about to get angry if he didn't get his titty soon. We completed the trip and no one got hurt - woohoo!!! Score: 1 us 0 timeout
YES! I finally reached the pinnacle of my day. At 7:30pm every night, my house deeply sighs a sigh of relief. This is the time that Isaac goes for his bath, Nicholas is in his swing asleep and the cat is full from dinner. After Isaac's bath it is teeth, ear and hair time then clothes, baby, blanket, story and bed! Isaac is done by 8:00pm and if my timing is right on, Nicholas is just waking up as I am walking back into the kitchen (where Nicholas' swing is.) Then Nicholas and I go through his bath ritual, the machine is turned on and plugged in and he cuddling, suckling happily on my boobs until 9:25pm. By 9:30pm, all kids are asleep and I'm exhausted.
Now for Happy Hour...
Between 9:30pm and 10:30pm, I have ME time. I sip my tea and smoke my smokes and usually play on the computer.
~~Here I am!
I've had 2 full pots of coffee this morning, this is me now - awake and alert - but earlier...
This morning, I rolled out of bed at the very early 5:30am and went straight to the coffee pot, which was empty. I thought for sure that I'd pee on myself before I assembled a pot of coffee to brew. After hitting the "on" button, I ran, very crosslegged, to the bathroom. The tasks may have taken 4 minutes max but that was 5 seconds too long for Nicholas. I sat at the computer while feeding him to avoid going to sleep with my breast in his mouth, it worked. The starving infant latched on to my breast, sucked 4 times and went to sleep knawing on my nipple. I allowed this while I waited on my coffee to brew and gently laid him back in his crib when it was done. After tipping over a couple of matchbox cars and miscellaneous toys, I grabbed my favorite cup -- 20oz thin, blue, ceramic -- and hastily filled it 3/4 full with the pipping hot eye opener. Then I dug through the fridge until I found the Hazelnut liquid creamer, filling the rest of the cup with it. I skipped the spoon and guzzled my first cup down. AHHHHH. I lit a smoke while I carefully mixed the next cup.
This mother's peace = a cup of coffee, a lit smoke and peace to enjoy them both. This 10 minute window of peace is found only early in the morning and is squeezed between the boys' schedules. I look forward to the only grown up time that I get daily. I may be conceited but these brief moments involves only me, my wishes and fullfills only my needs. It's better than sex and equally satisfying.
--ready for the day
hooked on more than a feeling
I can not believe I've been messing with this blog thing in every spare second that I've had today and now it is cutting into my sleep time. HELP! I need aa for blogging!
In other news...
The kitchen timer is about worn out due to 15 minute repeated settings all day long to remind me to remind Isaac to potty. lol
Diaper duty was cut in half today as a result of the kitchen timer.
My nipples are still sore and red. Extensive web searching paid off though. Lactating Experts say that they are caused by positioning problems. Off goes the pillow that I use to prop on while I'm feeding, so much for saving the arms!
Murphy (the cat) is still terribly upset that he can not go outside and roll in the mud puddles or run through the hay field and get stickers in his long fur. He cusses me every time I enter a room and refuses to let me pet him. We'll see how long this lasts though, I plan to fight back with the "no rub, no food" tactic. Eventually, he'll press his fat ass against my leg to remind me to feed him.
Did I mention that I hate change? I absolutely loath it! It causes me to have to go around to my elbow to get to my ass but it makes me more comfortable when I don't have to go through a change. I'm sure there is a term out there for this. It's probably closely related to people problem that I have. It can be blamed for everything that takes me longer to do, things I don't do and the things I will accidently forget to do tomorrow -- err today.
Wednesday, June 23, 2004
A Dollar Short....
Now that I'm blogging and understand the entire concept, I've taken the next natural step - purchasing a domain so that I can design my own Chronicles. Duh - you have to get webhosting too. Geez sometimes I only need 2 more pennies of thought but can't afford it!
As for my day...
It began extrememly early, 5:30am. Isaac slept until about 8:30am. Nicholas was wide awake at the crack of dawn wanting to eat so of course I whip the tit out and feed the starving tot. He is so cute and grunts when he eats. I can get him to smile at the drop of a hat and he cries for me when he can't see or hear me. Breastfeeding is going good. It's naturaly and fun. Sore, red, swollen nipples are no fun though. This is the first time with this so I'm not sure what caused it. I haven't had a monthly since he was born either. This could be the difference. Nicholas is my heart....
Meanwhile, Isaac - the best workout trainer around - had me running all morning. "Don't eat the crayons PLEASE!" "Isaac, why did you pee in your pants AGAIN!?!?!" "Fruit Loops are for your mouth not the cat's mouth" are just a few examples of my cries for help today. Isaac is my blood....
Today was the first day of hardcore potty training.
--Wish me luck!
A day late...
So I just found out about this blog stuff. Of course it would be a day late. Isaac's Birthday was yesturday, June 22, and he was 3 years old.
We celebrated with close family, his favorite food and the usual cake and icecream. All went well and he enjoyed his day. I went into greater detail on the family blog.
Now to convience him to use the potty all of the time.
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